Box Office Battlefield: ‘Godzilla’ vs. ‘Million Dollar Arm’

The weekend warriors of May 16, 2014 includes Godzilla and Million Dollar Arm. Every week, movie studios select candidates to enter the glorious battlefield for your hard-earned dollars, Box Office Battlefield is here to help you decide which movie(s) will take priority over the others and determine who will be victorious.

Last weekend, Neighbors hazed The Amazing Spider-Man 2 into submission. Dominating the battlefield, funny man Seth Rogen trampled over Sony’s dreams of a summer blockbuster. Will the dildo fights and gross out humor overcome the sheer size of the king of monsters? Clever girl. This is the Box Office Battlefield:

Godzilla (2014) (Gareth Edwards) Rated PG-13 [123 min] – The world’s most famous monster is pitted against malevolent creatures who, bolstered by humanity’s scientific arrogance, threaten our very existence. Starring Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Elizabeth Olsen, Bryan Cranston, Ken Watanabe, and Sally Hawkings

Rotten Tomatoes Score: Critics – 74% • Audience – 82%

An underwhelming disappointment, Godzilla works on the most basic levels and bores you to death. The visuals effects, cinematography is spectacular, but the fight scenes are droll, intercut with worthless human perspectives. The reintroduction of Godzilla in terms of sheer size and scope satisfies, but the movie does not feel epic enough to compete with recent blockbuster films. IF YOU HAVE TO SEE IT – BECAUSE THE SCALE OF THE MONSTER IS SO COOL – MATINEE IT! BUT IF YOU COULD CARE LESS, RENT IT! (Read my full review)

Million Dollar Arm (Craig Gillespie) Rated PG [124 min] – A sports agent stages an unconventional recruitment strategy to get talented Indian cricket players to play Major League Baseball. Starring Jon Hamm, Lake Bell, Aasif Mandvi, Alan Arkin, and Suraj Sharma

Rotten Tomatoes Score: Critics – 54% • Audience – 73%

There is something about these cookie cutter sports films that I find unappealing. They all end up to be the same. You start with hardened characters that loosen up because of their teammates or their players. I have not seen the film yet, but here’s what others are saying:

“[A] watchable but rambling, flaccid movie…” – Stephen Holden (New York Times)

“This sharp, slickly produced addition to the Disney sports movie canon works as both a stirring underdog tale and as a revealing look at the expanding global footprint of the American sports-entertainment machine.” – Scott Foundas (Variety)

Sounds like a mixed consensus. RENT IT FOR A LAZY NIGHT IN!

Those who wanted to see Neighbors have most likely seen it already. Godzilla’s marketing team has done a pretty tremendous job, despite what they had to work with, and it is also PG-13. Million Dollar Arm is too commercial, and I don’t think Jon Hamm is a superstar leading man yet. And The Amazing Spider-Man 2 is done. So as it stands, I believe the victor for this weekend shall be: